The Rampaging Hulk #3 - Marvel

June 1977 - Gosh, do I love The Rampaging Hulk.

Every time I buy one of these issues that I've never read before, I'm amazed I didn't buy them regularly as a kid. They are so fun, so exciting, and so goofy that I think as a six or seven year old I would've eaten these things up. Maybe it was the cover price?

Anyway, this is the third issue, "The Monster and the Metal Master!" by the ever-inventive Doug Moench, and a boffo art job by Walt Simonson and Alfredo Alcala, behind a beauty of a cover by Earl Norem.

As is usual with Alcala, you don't see a lot of the original pencils showing through, but what you can see is Simonson's trademark senses of layout and pacing, and the overall feel of the characters, like with the design of this robot:

...I mean, that's just an awesome robot.

The plot, picking up from last issue, involves an alien race named the Krylorians trying to take over Earth, and in this issue they are helped by another alien, a super-villain named The Metal Master, who I guess didn't check with Magneto first.

The baddies are chasing the Hulk, Rick Jones, and their alien comrade, a woman named Bereet. They find them in a small village outside Paris, where our heroes are trying to lay low.

Unfortunately, when Bruce Banner spots a friendly kid named Spirou get beaten up by his Dad, it causes him to Hulk out, and start letting the Dad this is unacceptable!

The Hulk's appearance is noticed by MM, who sends his nigh-indestructible robot to fight the Green Goliath. Then, the Metal Master tries using his powers on the "Spatial Distorter" of Bereet's, which causes all of them into another dimension, one where the laws of reality don't apply. This, of course, doesn't sit well with the Hulk:

..."Hulk does not like France. Ears not work right in stupid France." Ye Gods, did Doug Moench know how to write the Hulk.

The battle continues on in this dimension, while little Spirou tries to help his "Monster friend" by running off with the Spatial Distorter.

Then a bunch of stuff about "psychic energy" happens, and somehow Spirou is able to help Bereet affect what goes on in this dimension, giving the Hulk an extra edge. And after the Hulk has taken all he's going to take from the Metal Master, well...you know:

(click to Hulkify!)

This gets them all out of this dimension, and the story ends with little Spirou, safe and happy in the Hulk's arms. All is well...for now.

In addition to the Hulk feature, there's a two-page letter column, plus a back-up feature, "Bloodstone" by John Warner, Sal Buscema, and Rudy Nebres. Bloodstone is an adveture hero-type of guy, searching for fragments of a magical gem that would give him power over life and death.

No offense to the work of Misters Warner and Buscema, but I never got into Bloodstone too much, though this issue's story, where he tangles with IronMan, is fun in a classic "Action in the Mighty Marvel Manner" kinda way.

My lack of interest in Bloodstone doesn't matter too much though, because the Hulk feature is so fun. Moench's stories are particularly hard to summarize, because they seem to be very seat-of-your-pants, using bizarre, sometimes disparate elements that work fine in the context of the story but sound ridiculous when being analyzed like this.

Suffice it to say, the sheer enthusiasm with which these stories are told makes them enormously fun to read, and Simonson's storytelling is a perfect match--his Hulk is a squat, brutish figure, barely contained by the panel borders and given an extra level of fearsomeness from the wash tones used in these black and white books, instead of the usual full-color comic green.

I have to get the rest of these!

Rampaging Hulk #7 - Marvel

It's been a little while since we talked about the massive fun that was Rampaging Hulk--I mean, how can you look at this cover by Jim Starlin and not want to read the story inside?

Even though the cover says "Night of the Soul-Stealer" the story, by Doug Moench, Keith Pollard, and Jim Mooney, is called "Night of the Wraith!" It opens with Hulk smashing stuff, which is always a good way to start any Hulk story.

Hulk is traveling with Rick Jones and the myserious alien woman known only as Bereet(or"Bird Woman" as Hulk likes to call her), when he "spatial distorter pouch"(yes, you read that right) suddenly explodes with light, and weird creature--the one from the cover with the giant eyeball for a head--comes out of it.

Hulk attacks it(of course), but it can seemingly turn itself into mist, which makes Hulk mad, screaming "Bah! You cheat!" The creature envelops the Hulk and knocks him out. But Bereet manages to defend herself and the creature retreats.

Bereet explains Mr. Eyeball is from her home planet, and how its here to kill her. They follow its trail to a city on the Adriatic Sea, where the creature takes control of the Colossus of Rhodes, which then comes alive and gets to fight the Hulk! Don't say Doug Moench didn't know how to write stories with Hulk-size spectacle! I mean, Hulk vs. The Colossus of Rhodes--how can you ask for more?

Hulk destroys the Colossus(!) and the creature moves on, assuming the shapes of animals, and even Bereet herself, who it attempts to make turn on the Hulk! The Hulk uses a space-gun-type-machine on the now-evil Bereet, which drives the creature from Bereet, ridding the planet of it, seemingly forever. Bereet, Hulk, and Rick Jones wake up in a beautiful, new, alien-looking flower patch, and Bereet states "The dark fog is gone...and the souls of my dead creations have found a new purpose...a new resting place...here on Earth." And, for once, we get a happy ending to a Hulk story.

The second feature stars The Man-Thing, "Among the Great Divide!", by Steve Gerber, Jim Starlin, and Bob Wiacek. It opens with Man-Thing coming across a dessicated corpse, which might even be a better opening volley than the Hulk story had.

Man-Thing is attacked by a weird, animalistic swamp woman, which after a page or two he manages to fend off. He then comes across a small pocket of the swamp which seems to house a family of ghosts, surrounding a mysertious woman named Andrea who, you guessed it, seems to be gripped by multiple personalities. The story follows Andrea out of the swamp(I guess it's hard to find things to do with the Man-Thing, since he by nature wasn't as communicative and ambulatory as Swamp Thing) and into a local salloon, where her weird behavior gets her noticed by the other patrons.

There's an odd one-page sequence chronicling Andrea's life, which consists of one image surrounded by text. She's then grabbed by some goons from the saloon, who drag her back to the swamp, where some of her multiple personalties bust for and start defending her(yeah, this is a Steve Gerber story, all right)!

This of course spills over to the attention of the Man-Thing, who helps fend off the goons. The weird swamp woman reappears and attacks(we now know she, too, is a figment of Andrea's imagination), and he fends her off, forcing Andrea to face all her delusions. Andrea staggers off to a local hospital, in a hopeful attempt to come to grips with all that has happened(good luck with that), and the Man-Thing slowly decends back into the swamp, the whole episode basically meaning nothing, since the Man-Thing "has no emotions of his own, [he] cannot feel elation...or pride...or even relief."

Gee, thanks. Now I'm depressed. And we wonder why the Man-Thing never quite took off?

But the ad for next issue promises fun, fun, fun, with The Hulk taking on....IronMan!! (I gotta pick that one up!)

The Rampaging Hulk #6 - Marvel

Part 2 of the pulse-pounding, thrill-a-minute slugfest told in the Mighty Marvel Manner! (hey, it isn't so hard writing like Stan Lee)

Behind a cover by Ken Barr (you don't see many yellow backgrounds on superhero comics covers; works pretty well), the story, "...And All the Sea, With Monsters!" again by Doug Moench, Keith Pollard, and inks (this time) by Tony DeZuniga, finds Hulk and Rick Jones heading to Alantis to find Namor and the kidnapped Bereet. There's also an alien race involved, named the Krylorians.

The only way Namor agrees to return Bereet is to have a deathmatch with Hulk, which he reponds to with: "Bah! Hulk will squash Fish-Face like a wet bug!"...and yet Namor goes through with it. Ah, self-confidence. They start off using Atlantean combat weapons, but it doesn't take long until their just pounding each other with their fists. It's decent Marvel-style battle, but nothing like the one we saw the previous issue.

Eventually the Krylorians and some mutant sea creaturs attack Atlantis, and Namor and Hulk team up to fight them. Since there is no alien force alive strong enough to take on Hulk and Namor, it's not long before the little Krylorians are yelling "Retreat!!"

The second half of the book is a continuation of the Bloodstone feature, this one called "Conspiracy, Ascendant" again by John Warner, with art by Allen Kupperberg and Sonny Trinidad. For some reason, Bloodstone's feature would skip next issue (in favor of a Man-Thing story) and continue in #8. Two pages of "Readers Rampage" (with a great title illustration by Marie Severin) round out the issue.

Hulk be back next issue!

The Rampaging Hulk #5 - Marvel

This might be my all-time favorite individual issue of a comic b/w magazine. I bought it during vacation in the Poconos when I was just a wee lad of six years old. That look on the Hulk's face (courtesy Jim Starlin) terrified me, though I bought it anyway. Has the Hulk ever looked more menacing, more angry? I remember having nightmares--actual nightmares--about this Hulk cover. Good job, Mr. Starlin!

Anyway, the Rampaging Hulk magazine was fairly innovative for its day--these were stories of the Hulk that fit inbetween his adventures in the very early 60s. Nowadays the concept of "Untold Stories of..." is commonplace, but back then it was a pretty novel idea. Hulk was also the first real superstar of the Marvel superhero line to get his own black and white, and to have it thrive. Maybe it was due to stories like this--"Lo, the Sub-Mariner Strikes!"

Written by the ever-reliable Doug Moench and drawn by Keith Pollard and Alfredo Alcala, the story picks up where the previous issue left off, where Hulk, Rick Jones, and an alien named Bereet run afoul of Namor, who is of course pissed off about something. An angry mob throws a brick at Bereet, which knocks her out. Namor is offended at this, and starts tearing through the crowd like a hot knife through butter. Bruce Banner starts stressing out, and of course transforms into the Hulk. The Hulk, though, wants to stop the fighting, and he does this by starting to fight with Namor. More fighting will lead to less fighting. When did Hulk join the Republican Party?

Anyway, Hulk and Namor have at it for a few pages, and the fight is really a marvel (sorry) of storytelling construction and flow. Maybe because this was in the b/w magazine and therefore aimed at a slightly older audience, Marvel felt it was ok to ramp up the savagery a little. You really get the sense these two are pounding the No-Prizes out of each other, which leads to this great page:

For years, between the time when I first got this magazine and when I found it again via ebay, I was sure that Namor had punched Hulk right in the No-Prize (too much?). I was sure of it. Now, of course, I can tell he hit Hulk a little north of that. Nevertheless, it makes quite an impact--you really get the sense just how strong Namor is. The only problem at all I see is...the lettering lets us down. Wump? That's it? This page was way too bombastic for such a puny sound effect, and Hulk hate puny sound effects! I think it should been more like this:

...there, that's better.

They fight some more, the Army joins in (of course--the Army never met a Hulk battle they didn't like. Hulk must get christmas cards from Lockheed Martin), and Namor kidnaps Bereet and flies off. To be continued!

After all this, you'd think Marvel could let you relax with some Bullpen Bulletins or maybe a Hostess ad or something. But no! You jump right into the back-up feature starring a mercenary-adventure guy named Bloodstone, in a story called "Suite Fear!" (cute), written by John Warner (?), and drawn by Val Mayerik and Bob Wiacek. Bloodstone gets caught in a deathtrap (several, actually) and there's some weird robot-skeleton guy named the Modular Man. There's absolutely nothing wrong with this feature, but after the rip-roaring, pulse-pounding lead, nearly anything would be a letdown.

There's a two-page letter column, and then a full-page ad for issue #6 depicting Namor and Hulk fighting it out, again--underwater! Hoo hah, this is gonna be good!