Savage Tales #4 - Marvel

Still being in a macho magazine mood (say that five times fast), I went looking into my b/w collection for the most macho mag I could find. I think I did a pretty good job with this--Savage Tales #4, with a cover by Neal Adams of Conan the Barbarian about to behead a bad guy, simultaneously saving a comely wench! As the cover tag says--"More Savage Than Ever!"

The first story is "Night of the Dark God" by Roy Thomas, Gil Kane, Neal Adams, the oddly-named "Diverse Hands", and Pablo Marcos! Conan sails to a a faraway land to save the beautiful Mala, daughter of Hafgar of the Hillmen, who has been kidnapped by the villainous Thorfel, who wants her as his bride.

Before Conan can arrive, Mala, who would rather be dead than be fouled by Thorfel, takes her own life. This happens just as Conan arrives, which of course sends him into a Cimmerian rage, hacking and slashing at every member of Thorfel's band. I'd be hard pressed to come up with a better storytelling team thank Kane and Adams to convey the savagery with which Conan goes after these guys. Even though the violence is gruesome, under the touch of Kane and Adams it approaches a thing of beauty.

After a two-piece article about the magazine by Roy Thomas is a photo article about Jason and the Argonauts. Why? I have no idea, but I'm not complaining since JATA is one of my favorite movies!

Next is an uncredited reprint tale "The Crusader" about King Richard. I don't recognize the art style, but it's a soldily-drawn little tale. At five pages, its over before you know it.

There's another text article about Conan by Thomas, and then a second Conan tale, "Dweller in the Dark" by Thomas and Barry Smith, where he takes on a giant monster (of course, this being Conan). This is the story that features the semi-famous sequence of the-nude-woman-in-a-bath-who-comes-on-to-Conan, and a few panels had to be touched up to meet with Comics Code approval. This story is reprinted from the color Conan the Barbarian comic (#12, to be exact), so I'm a little surprised Marvel didn't go back in and re-retouch the art to be reprinted here, since Marvel could get away with more in the b/w magazines--which was of course the whole point of these things!

In addition to all this, there's a both inside-covers Conan pin-up by P.Craig Russell! Gil Kane, Neal Adams, Barry Smith, and P.Craig Russell--by Crom, what a deal for 75 cents!

Deadly Hands of Kung Fu #4 - Marvel

After talking about Cobb, I'm still in a macho mood, magazine-wise (I, myself, not being so at all), so I thought I'd talk about The Deadly Hands of Kung-Fu, Marvel's sort-of companion magazine to their popular Master of Kung-Fu color comic. What's more macho than that?

Not being a kung-fu movie fan, I appreciate this magazine more from a comic-art perspective--I mean, how could you not buy a magazine that has a cover like this?

After an editorial by the always-entertaining Tony "The Tiger" Isabella, is "Circle of Serpent's Blood", by the always-prolific Doug Moench, with art by Mike Vosburg and Al Milgrom, starring Shang-Chi, the aforementioned Master of Kung-Fu! Shang-Chi is pursued by the agents of his nemesis, Fu Manchu, including a giant killer ape. That's all you need to know.

After the letters page(s), and an article about the movie Enter the Dragon, is an "introspective evaluation" (it was the 70's) on the Kung-Fu TV show with some nice spot illustrations credited to Frank McLaughlin. I say credited to because, while some of the pieces are undoubtedly by McLaughlin (who is a martial artist in real life), there are pieces like this:

...I dunno, this looks awfully Neal Adams to me.

After that is an ad for a black-and-white Iron Fist magazine, one of many ads that appeared in Marvel b/w mags at the time. Unfortunately, for reasons I know not, Iron Fist never saw the light of day (my hunch is the kung-fu craze was dying down and Marvel just didn't think another magazine would fly).

Next is The Sons of the Tiger starring in "Night of the Death-Dream!" by Gerry Conway, Don Perlin, ande Dan Adkins. The Sons attempt to apprehend a bad guy named Lo Chin as he arrives at an airport (not every villain can afford a secret HQ inside a volcano), but it doesn't go as planned and there's a lot of kicking. A lot.

It all wraps up with an ad for the next issue (one of my favorite little extras in these b/w magazines), where it promises an article called "Kung-Fu vs. Karate--Which is Better?" See you in sixty!

Cobb #1 - IDW

Another classic black-and-white magazine courtesy the cool folks at IDW, publishers of Doomed!

This is Cobb, written by Beau Smith and drawn by Eduardo Barreto, about a hard-bitten former Secret Service agent who is now a quasi private detective, along with his longtime mentor, Jack Murphy, and Murphy's comely niece Molly. It's hard-bitten, violent, and full of tough talk, like any good private eye story should be! Cobb gets taken in by his mentor after landing in jail, and they get drawn into protecting a young Russian woman on the run from a mobster.

Cobb is a regular standard size comic from IDW, but for whatever wonderful reason they decided to do this black and white, magazine-size edition, which collects the first three issues of the regular series. It's one long sixty-five(!) page story, along with classic-style pin-ups and character bios.

All told, it makes for a really beautiful package--no ads, and the paper is of very high quality (ironically, that's my only quibble--I'm not sure Cobb needs such nice, high-falutin' paper stock. this kind of gritty story in this format cries out for the more rough, typical b/w magazine paper). It's a good solid tale, well told, with equally solid art by Barreto.

In a world of mostly superheroes, a good old fashioned private eye comic must be a hard sell, but IDW seems to be trying to buck that trend with a lot of their titles, so they're probably the best place for Cobb. The indicia says "Cobb Magazine #1"; I hope that means they have every intention of doing more!

After Hours #1 - Jay Publishing, aka Warren!

I've managed to find something even more rare than the already-indexed fourth issue of After Hours--this, the very first issue of Jim Warren's first magazine!

When I came across it on ebay, I was a little disappointed that the cover logo was stripped off (a practice still done to this day, where the logo or whole front cover is ripped off and returned to the publisher for credit as an unsold copy), but these first three issues are so hard to find (even the fine folks at TwoMorrows, when they were compiling their Warren Companion book, couldn't find the first three issues for indexing) that I decided to get it anyway, since the rest of the issue was complete.

Of course, there is no connection to the world of black and white comic magazines other than this one name on the credits:

...no, not assistant editor George Novak, silly! James Warren!


Unlike the fourth issue, this inaugural volume has actual nudity, brief as though it is. It features lots of short fiction, cartoons, pin-ups, a Bettie Page centerfold(!), and weird articles like "Young Man with a Nightclub", about a guy that "turned a former stable into a thriving Supper Club." Former stable?

It's a profile of the club, and how its populated by comedians, actors, actresses, general men-about-town, and dancers like this:

...for God's sake, if this is someone you find attractive, seek medical attention.

Even though the other two issue are more like this one (i.e. no comic book, sci-fi, or related-genre content) I still plan to be on the lookout for them. Apparently Jim Warren himself doesn't even own a complete set, so maybe if I ever find #s 2 and 3, I'll give them to him if I'm ever lucky enough to meet him in person...

Eerie #2 - Warren

This is probably the closest I'll ever get to owning the first issue of Eerie, since the "real" first issue was little more than an all-black-and-white "ashcan" edition, hastily thrown together by Jim Warren and company to secure copyright on the title.

There are so few in existence that I've never even seen one for sale, anywhere. It became so sought-after in the 60s that someone actually made bootleg versions, with drove Jim to run a "Most Wanted" ad for the counterfeiters in some of his magazines, and even drew attention by the FBI!

Heck, I'd even take one of those.

Anyway, this is the first issue proper of Eerie, and a cover by Frank Frazetta is a good way to start. First up is Archie Goodwin and Reed Crandall's "Footsteps of Frankenstein", a riff on the classic story with all new characters, with a patented Goodwin twist ending.

Next is "One for De-Money" by E.Nelson Bridwell(!) and Angelo Torres, about a guy playing around with the underworld. Bad idea. Third is "Eye of the Beholder", by Goodwin and "Jay Taycee" (aka Johnny Craig), another story about a guy who attempts to cheat Death who took away his true love. When will these guys learn?

"Flame Fiend" by Eando Binder and Gray Morrow, who really turned in an outstanding art job here (didn't he always?), and then a one-page "Eerie's Monster Gallery"--a profile of a werewolf by John Severin! Maybe it's all the years of seeing his work in Cracked, but I can't help but chuckle at his rendition of a werewolf, carrying off some poor village wench. I don't think it was meant to be funny.

Next is "To Pay the Piper!" by Larry Ivie and Gene Colan, who did very little work for Warren, all of it excellent--the wash tones he employed really brough his work to life, much moreso than the colors applied to his superhero stuff. It's a vampire tale, with another classic monster guest-starring...

As if having Johnny Craig, Gray Morrow, Frank Frazetta, Reed Crandall, Gene Colan, and John Severin wasn't enough, we've got "Vision of Evil" by Archie Goodwin and...Alex Toth!!! This is a quick, grim little story of a painter with an evil spirit, knocked out the park with excitement by Mr. Toth.

It says something about the level of artwork in this issue that the next story "Ahead of the Game!" by Goodwin and Joe Orlando and about a cruel wild-game hunter, is even slightly a let down. Usually, a story by Goodwin and Orlando would be a highlight. Only in this company is it average.

The back cover features a portrait of Cousin Eerie by another master, Jack Davis! Behind Eerie is a pastiche of all the stories in this issue, so this is the closest we'll ever get to a Craig-Morrow-Crandall-Colan-Toth-Torres-Orlando-Davis jam piece.

All this in the first issue--talk about hitting the ground running!

Savage Sword of Conan #23 - Marvel

After a brief hiatus we're back with one of my favorite issues, SSOC #23, guest-starring everybody's favorite she-devil with a sword, Red Sonja!

First off--the cover, by Earl Norem--it's just gorgeous. Well designed, nice colors, exciting as hell. How anyone seeing this on the stands could've not bought it is beyond me.

The main story "Torrent of Doom", by Roy Thomas, John Buscema (Conan artist #1, IMO), and Alfredo Alcala, is actually the second part of a two-part story. Normally I would've seeked out the first part before I read this, but this issue looked like so much fun I went ahead anyway (and I was right).

It picks up with Conan stumbling across a group of demon-like zombies dragging a bunch of unconcious buccaneers away, into a mysterious city (aren't they all?). Conan, accompanied by a lovely wench (of course), follows them into the city to see what the Crom is going on.

Conan runs afoul of these zombie guys, and starts hacking into them with his broad-sword--a dozen pages or so of Buscema-style mayhem! It looks bad for our cimmerian pal until the Buccaneers wake up, itching for revenge, and help Conan turn a few hundred zombies into a thousand little chunks of zombies. They of course escape back onto the buccaneer's ship, setting sail for more adventure!

Next is a historical text piece called "Stygia, Serpent of the South" written by Robert Yaple with spot illustrations by Rick Hoberg, tracking Conan's movements through the Hyborian Age. Third is a Kull story, "The Striking of the Gong" by Thomas, Rock Hoberg, and Bill Wray, where Kull gets transported to a weird, alternate dimension(!).

Wendy Pini is next up with an article on Red Sonja, and she also draws a really nice pin-up page of her. More provocative are photos of Wendy and other Sonja fan Linda Behrle dressed up as Sonja! I had always heard Wendy made for an amazingly striking real-life Sonja, and these photos bear that out, but this Linda Behrle was no slouch either:

...I cannot imagine an actual human being actually trying to put that outfit on--talk about chafing. Ouch!

Next is "Wizards of the Black Sun", a Red Sonja tale by Thomas (again!) and the always-awesome Frank Thorne. To me, there was simply no Sonja artist anywhere near Thorne--his look doesn't look like anyone else's, in terms of storytelling and sheer draftsmanship. Sonja takes on evil wizards, living skeletons--lots of good blood-letting fun.

Of course, now that we've reached the end of the issue, we see that Conan and Sonja don't, in fact, team up to fight some giant evil octopus thingy. Oh well, maybe next issue...

Demon! #3 - Portman Distribution (aka Marvel UK)

Sometimes when I'm buying multiple comics from one seller, I'll look and see what b/w mags they might be selling that I can pick up for a few bucks. If someone's willing to not charge any additional shipping, I figure why not?

I found this little gem a week or so ago and now that I'm done rereading The Warren Companion (for like the seventh time) I thought I'd post this, the third issue of a British magazine called Demon--oh, excuse me, Demon!

Juding by its contents, I'd say Demon (I mean Demon!--dammit) is a UK version of a Marvel b/w magazine, since it features the Marvel character Satana, and the whole thing is done by the likes of Gerry Conway, Tony Isabella, Doug Moench, Tom Sutton, Sonny Trinidad, with a cover by Frank Brunner. I have not been able to find this particuar (particularly awesome!) cover on any other Marvel comic, so I wonder if this was commissioned for the British edition. Inside, there's no indication that these stories are anything but original to this magazine (Marvel isn't even listed as publisher in the indicia).

First is a Gabriel, Devil-Hunter story "To Worship the Damned" by Doug Moench and Sonny Trinidad, and features a really creepy looking demon(hence the title of the magazine, I guess). I mean, ew:

...good old-fashioned nightmare fuel. Thanks Mr.Trinidad!

Next is a "Satana, the Devil's Daughter" text-piece by Gerry Conway with some nice spot pieces by Estaban Moroto and Pablo Marcos. Ah, the 70s. The third piece is "Grave Business" a great, macabre tale written and drawn by Tom Sutton. Sutton really could combine horror and dark, dark humor like no one else, though this story does end especially gruesomely.

"Deathwatch", by Conway and Yong Montano(?) is a grim morality tale set during war, also with a really gruesome ending. Satana is back with her own comics story called "Bloody is the Path to Hell" (ironically, also the name of Ann Coulter's next book), where we get to see her make-out with a demon named Zannarath. Again--ah, the 70s. The story continues into Part 2, titled "This Side of Hell", where Satana makes out with another guy until she drains all the life out of his body, leaving just an empty husk. Where else can you go after that?

The back cover features an ad for another magazine called Journey into Nightmare, which features a Neal Adams Man-Thing cover, reprinted from Monsters Unleashed! I believe. The ad copy proclaims its "64 pages of utter misery, fear, weirdness, screams, neurosis, poison, violence, blight, evil, malice, and suffering." I was going to say that's the same description of Ann Coulter's next book, but I already made that joke.

But, as the ad undoubtedly intended, it makes me want to get it!

Teen Love Stories #3 - Warren

Today we wrap up our profiling of the odd Warren series, Teen Love Stories. There was a fourth issue, but it is apparently very, very hard to find (even TwoMorrows couldn't find a copy for review for their Warren Companion book).

That happens a lot with final issues--by their very nature, they are the last whimper out the door of a series that wasn't selling well, so a lot of newsstand vendors were no doubt burying TLS behind better-selling publications. I still hold out hope I'll find it someday. The collectors life is sometimes a lonely one.

Anyway, this third issue is another collection of romance comics, advice columns, and articles on, you guessed it, romance. Although the cover is a bit disturbing, with its scary headline "A romantic warning to Hayley Mills!" Yikes!

The romance-comic portion is a story called "Truth Can Hurt" set in the world of racing. Like the previous issues, there are no credits, no periods on the end of sentences, but some nifty artwork. Just check out the excellent drafting and use of blacks and whites on this page:

That top panel could be very boring--its just a person ringing a doorbell--but I find the use of negative space, not to mention it being just a very-well-drawn hand, makes it a very attractive image. I don't know what British comics these were reprinted from, but they sure were drawn nice. Its thirty-six pages of romantic fun!

Next is a text article, called "How to Make a Boy Do Anything You Want!" (do you need a whole article to answer that?). The main thing that's disturbing about it is the sub-title:

"A woman is a woman for only one reason: a man. You're going to live your life with and for a man." Wow, we have Jim Warren to thank for Maxim! Who woulda thought?

Samantha Kirk is back with more advice for the lovelorn, and the common thread in all three of these seems to be young, almost pre-pubescent girls dating guys almost legal adults. What the hell was going on back in the 60s? In this issue, there's one letter from a girl talking about going steady with a boy since she was eleven. Eleven?? Even Ms. Kirk took the time to point out how f**ked up that was.

The creepy "Ask Chuck" column is back, but I think between this and the previous issue someone told Chuck to take it down a notch. The answers this time a lot more sensible and reasonable, i.e. boring.

Next is an article about the dangers of drinking, called "If I Don't Think He'll Think I'm Nowhere" (after #2's pot article, I guess they were trying cover all the addiction bases. Did #4 take on the dangers of...teen-age gambling??) Then we get Nurse Ellen Andrews back to answer questions about medical issues, like the one from "Miss B" in Alabama. She's sixteen, her boyfriend's twenty, and they really wanna have sex. Should they?*

There's s a prose piece called "This Time is Ours", and then the cover-threatened article on Hayley Mills, which opens with "Hayley Mills Has Been a Swinger Since Her Early Teens." Hotcha! And Lindsay Lohan thinks she knows how to party!

Finally, disappointingly, there are no wallet-size boy photos for the inside back cover this issue; I guess the editors ran out of oddly-boyish-looking thirty-five-year-olds to run pics of.

And so we come to the end (for now) of our trip down memory lane to explore one of the oddest, most obscure parts of the Warren Publishing Story--Teen Love Stories. Stay mod, everybody!

*for God's sake, no

Teen Love Stories #2 - Warren

Another very bizarre issue of Teen Love Stories, which, like Blazing Combat, was banned from sale at PX bases around the country (not really, but wouldn't that have made for a great story?).

We open with another absurdly-long British romance comic story, titled "Just Her Luck", which is uncredited and runs thirty-six pages. The art is more more of a 60s-vibe, and is actually pretty nice. Like the first issue, this story contains no periods at the end of any sentences. What, was punctuation still be rationed over there in the 60s for the war effort?

Next is an article simply called "Pot." It's very good-intentioned, and funny as hell to read. After that, Samantha Kirk is back to help you with your love problems, and then we have some horoscopes (hmm, apparently I shouldn't be so stubborn when he asks me to go to the game or go bowling. good advice).

And then after that, we have the return of everybody's favorite, way-too-happy-to-the-point-of-being-disturbing male columnist, Chuck, in "Ask Chuck." Unfortunately, since the publication of the first issue, I think Chuck got a little ahead of himself and became convinced he needed to kick his answers up a notch. What was a weird-yet-harmless advice column for girls has become a weird, Nietzsche-an foray into existentialism and self-hate:

"...sooner or later you'll hate me. Everybody does." Whoa. Chuck, want to talk about it?

What could follow that? Well, there's an article on "How to Make Your Summer Romance Last", but it just goes by in a blur as you try to recover from "Ask Chuck." Then there's yet another article, called "Shhhh!!! Things You Never Tell A Boy"--perhaps things like "I have a crush on a columnist named Chuck."

Nurse Ellen Andrews is back with her medically-oriented advice column, with helpful reverse-type headers like "LSD", "Chapped Lips", and "Shaving Legs." Then we've got our movie-and-music column, "Flicks and Discs", telling us to "pay attention to The Tremeloes. We think they're going to be of the (emphasis theirs) important groups. And they're all adorable, too!"(emphasis mine)

At the end we've got some Captain Company-esque ads, except they're all for music fan clubs and posters, not a 6 ft. Frankenstein cut-out in sight (*sigh*). And, again like last issue, we end with a bunch of wallet photos of "Boys You'd Like to Love." You know, boys like Trini Lopez (age thirty), Hans Gudegast (???), and...Terence Stamp??? Kneel before Zod, teenage girls!

Teen Love Stories #1 - Warren

Undoubtedly one of the weirdest publications in Warren's history, Teen Love Stories is a hodge-podge of romance comics, interviews with famous women, Midol ads, and advice columns.

Apparently, Warren got the rights to publish some British romance comics for a song and used them as the main ingredient to his very hip, very mod new publication, sure to flood the Warren coffers with tons of new cash. Obviously, it didn't quite work out that way. Jim admits in The Warren Companion that it was an attempt to cash in, no two ways about it, and it "simply didn't work."

I think Warren's intentions were perfectly sound--and he deserves praise for trying to expand his company's audience base by making a magazine purely for girls (you didn't see a lot of 11-year-old girls picking up Blazing Combat), but this magazine is so deliriously strange, seemingly put together via the time-tested "dart board" method, that if I chose to scan every odd thing in just this issue, I'd have to scan the entire thing!

So I picked the two things that jumped out at me the most. First, during the interminable comic story, "Follow Your Heart" (which runs an uncredited thirty-eight pages), comes this very odd ad, right in the middle of page eighteen:

Huh??

Anyway, after the story (which doesn't feature a period in the lot, despite the Midol ads) is an advice column with someone named Samantha Kirk, who's here to solve your love problems. Yay! Anyway, at the end of the feature comes this doozy:

Aaaaahhhh!!!! Where's Dateline NBC when you need them??

Luckily, Ms.Kirk sets her young charge straight, giving the advice: "...wait a while." Nowhere in her answer is "...and have your parents call the police."

After that, the most disturbing letters page since Batman and the Outsiders*, comes an article on fashion model Twiggy. Then another advice column, this time with registered nurse(?) Ellen Andrews. This one is more medically oriented, with questions about periods and acne. No one is issued a No-Prize.

Next is another comics feature, which looks like a newspaper strip reprinted, called "I'll Be Yours, My Love" which actually is pretty well drawn. It looks like a Neal Adams knock-off, but hey, even a Neal Adams knock-off is still pretty good. After only three pages of that is a love quiz called "Ah, But Does He Really Love You?" and then yet another advice column (jeez, young girls need a lot of advice--lather, rinse, repeat--how hard is that?), except this one is called "Ask Chuck", and, yes, it has young girls asking a weirdly smiling guy for love advice. My only comment is this sentence from one of his answers, barely taken out of context: "Let me assure you that yours is not as unique a problem as you might think. It's occurred all through history and caused some of the best murders, suicides, and vendettas."

And Frank Miller thinks he writes hard-boiled well!

As if that wasn't enough, next is a half-page anti-smoking comic strip, drawn by Frank Frazetta, (this time called "Is This Story About Your Boyfriend?") that was appearing in various Warren mags at the time. Then there are some classified ads ("Long Live the One and Only Peter of the Monkees"), and then a one-page music column ("Also, don't forget The Mothers of Invention, Jefferson Airplane, The Fugs, and Sop-With-Camel. Between them, these groups will revolutionize the musical world in the months ahead!"). Then there's a two-page for pin-ups featuring such heartthrobs as W.C.Fields, Bill Cosby, Robert Kennedy, and the Hulk.

The inside back cover features, as promised on the front, "Wallet Photos of Boys You'd Like To Love!" I like to think I have an in-depth knowledge of pop culture from before my time, so I'm sort of amazed that out of the fourteen dreamboats pictured, I only recognize Ringo, Mickey Dolenz, James Darren, and David McCallum. Peter Deuel? Bruce Scott? Yale Summers?

And to think...I have two more issues of Teen Love Stories to go!


*a free magazine to anyone who gets that joke